The Grocery Store...It's A Trap!

So I went to the grocery store today. Those of you new to my posts will probably wonder what the big deal is. Thousands of people go to grocery stores all the time without anything happening. The rest of you that follow along my misadventures know differently. So here we go, a post about Joey going to the grocery store.

As I was walking through the produce section, yeah I said it; produce section, I was trying to remember if I had garlic. I was walking around thinking “Do we have garlic? Do we have garlic? Do we have garlic?” While I'm thinking about that, a helpful employee comes up and asks if he could help me. I respond “Do you know if I have garlic?” He gives me a smile that all retail people use to humor idiot customers and walks away.

Next, I had to find some canned tomatoes and tomato paste. So I'm walking up and down the canned fruit vegetable and section and I'm trying to figure out if tomatoes are fruits or vegetables. Turns out, that the point is moot since the canned tomatoes are kept in with the pasta sauces. This led me to be painfully aware that I am way too domesticated and would never survive again by myself in the wild.

I take all my stuff and go to checkout. The nice young lady grabs the dozen roses that I am going to give Wendy and a thorn gets her in the palm of her hand. This leads me to say “Every rose has it's thorn huh?” She gives me a smile that all retail people use to humor idiot customers and keeps on ringing me up. I didn’t care because I got to quote Poison so my day was complete. Here is where I want to point out that Wendy better appreciate the roses since they literally has cause people to have blood on their hands.

After I bought my stuff, the nice young lady handed me my receipt and said “Thank you mister Lantz.” We need to get a new club card together.