Just An Excuse To Say Shamwow

So I went to 7-11 to get a quick bite to eat. I know that there is plenty of things wrong with this statement, but can we get by that and focus on the story please?

So I make my way to the refrigerator area to grab a sandwich, trying to eat a little healthy. Yes, I know you don’t go to 7-11 and think healthy but give me a break; I was working on a deadline. Again, not the point of the story, focus people!

When I arrive to the chilled food products I found my access blocked by some dude lying on the floor. Well I am at the 7-11 and have seen weirder things than that. Of course that was usually after three in the morning when the freaks come out. This was around noon and not a typical part of the day for guys spending any amount of time on the floor of a convenience store.

After further investigation I found that this guy was actually working. He was spraying insecticide under the refrigerator. There was food sitting on the shelves, being chilled by the motor under the machine that was being sprayed with poison.

I have seen better marketing schemes that this. “Buy 10 chicken nuggets and receive a kick to your nuggets for free." Or “We got great rebates for the new Hummer. We will even throw in a hose going from the tailpipe into the passage area." Then there is my favorite, “Not only will I give you a second Shamwow, I will send a hooker over to your house to kick your ass!”

Needless to say, I didn’t get the healthy sandwich. I just picked up my usual; Cool Ranch Doritos, Ho Hos and Diet Mountain Dew. Hey, it was Diet Dew damn it!